The Relationship Between Grief and Addiction

HHRC-Young man at balcony in depression suffering emotional crisis and grief

The Online Dictionary defines grief as “deep sorrow, especially caused by someone’s death.” In the online Merriam-Webster, grief is defined as “deep and poignant distress caused by or as if by bereavement.” The common denominator here is a deep sadness in response to death and loss.

For Help Guide, an online mental health authority, grief is described as an emotional response to loss, and it occurs when you lose someone or something you love through death.

How To Deal With Grief

The first step in dealing with grief is to recognize that grief is not a one-time occurrence but rather a process with various stages, including:

Denial

When examining the denial stage of grief, it is necessary to note what it involves and why it happens. The denial stage involves denying that the death and subsequent loss ever happened. Even if we know on a subconscious level that the death happened, we refuse to face up to it. Psychiatric specialists believe that denial, when part of the grief process, is a self-defense mechanism that stops us from becoming overwhelmed by painful emotions.

Anger

In the denial stage, we shut emotions out to protect ourselves from being overwhelmed. However, after a period has passed, we allow ourselves to start to feel again, and invariably the most pronounced feeling will be anger. In the second stage of grief, we experience anger at the loss, and often that anger will overflow into other areas of our life.

Typically, we will ask ourselves questions like, “why did this happen to me,” or, “what have I done wrong to deserve these feelings.” There is no answer to these questions, and that lack of answers leads to feelings of anger.

Bargaining or Wishful Thinking

After that feeling of anger has passed, we often engage in a type of bargaining with ourselves or wishful thinking. For example, when confronted with grief, it is perfectly natural to say to yourself, “I wish that never happened,” or, “if only I could go back in time.” We know this is only wishful thinking and can never come true, but that doesn’t stop us from wishing anyway. Making these wishes enables us to avoid the painful grief temporarily.

Depression

The Oxford Dictionary defines depression as “a medical condition in which a person feels very sad, anxious and without hope and often has physical symptoms such as being unable to sleep, etc. “The American Psychiatric Society defines it as “a common and serious medical illness that negatively affects how you feel, think, and act.”

Depression is viewed as a disease, and therefore it is something that can be cured. However, while it may be true that depression is harmful, it is also true that depression is part of the grief process and can therefore be viewed as a step towards healing.

Acceptance

The final stage of the grief process is acceptance, and this is where we finally face up to the feelings of grief and loss and acknowledge them. We accept the reality of death and the feelings of loss. Put another way, we come to terms with death and loss and learn to get on with our lives.

It is important to realize that acceptance is not the final stage of the grieving process but an essential point in the healing process. Acceptance can only happen after grief, not before it, to be an effective part of the healing process.

Other Ways to Deal with Grief

Remember that grief is personal, and it is never inappropriate to grieve. In fact, quite the opposite. Grieving is a natural process and part of the healing process. Realize that there is no set time limit for grief.

The time spent grieving will differ from person to person. It is always best to be patient when grieving and allow the process to unfold naturally. Be aware that grief can act as a trigger for a variety of other harmful emotions. Never be afraid to seek out help or support. Try to keep up a level of physical fitness, as this will help with mental fitness.

Medications for Grief

There are various medicines that people take or are prescribed by doctors that help manage grief. The medications prescribed to help people manage their grief include anti-depressants, anxiety medications, or medication designed to help you sleep.

Other medications for grief management will often include blood pressure medications, sleeping pills, and vitamins to increase energy levels and support their immune system.

Unresolved Grief and Substance Abuse

According to studies conducted by the Betty Ford clinic, the relationship between grief and addiction is bidirectional, or in layman’s terms, it works both ways. People experiencing unresolved grief are more likely to engage in substance abuse, and those engaging in substance abuse are more likely to experience extreme emotions during the loss of a loved one or significant other.

Grief is a painful emotion, and studies have shown that people experiencing prolonged grief are more likely to turn to drugs or alcohol to dull the pain, hence the close relationship between grief and addiction. The likelihood of drug abuse among people experiencing grief further increases among people with certain risk factors. Some of these risk factors are:

  • When grief is bottled up and kept inside, this can lead a person to become trapped by their grief.
  • People who fail to express their grief healthily are more likely to turn to drugs and use them as a security blanket or an emotional crutch.
  • People experiencing prolonged grief need a support system, and when that support system is absent, grieving people are more likely to use drugs as a replacement.
  • Studies have shown that people grieving over losing a sibling or a partner are more likely to engage in substance abuse.
  • Lastly, people who experience a traumatic death are more susceptible to drug abuse.

Conclusion

Grief is a painful and sometimes overwhelming process that can be divided into stages. These stages include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. There is an evidenced relationship between grief and addiction. People often turn to drugs to forget their grief and dull the pain.

Furthermore, it is also clearly shown that people who turn to drugs for psychological reasons (such as using them to dull emotional pain) are more likely to become addicted.

Haven House Can Help.

For those suffering from grief and addiction problems, there are professional centers like Haven House Recovery Center, the top drug rehab in Murfreesboro, that supply social support groups and specialized grief and addiction counseling. The friendly and professional staff at Haven House are here to help you. You can partake in support group sessions, share your experiences and feelings, and learn about the different stages of grief and how to manage grief-based addiction.

If you are experiencing grief and addiction, the caring professionals at Haven House can help. You can partake in support group sessions, join a grief and addiction counseling, share your experiences and feelings, learn to manage grief, and perhaps most importantly, discover God’s love and guidance.